Don’t be overwhelmed by the list. Many of these are things I wish someone had shared with me earlier. The more you do- the more deeply you will feel the love you are giving to yourself. Love we usually reserve for everyone else, but ourselves. I am wishing you more self-love this year and every year from here on out. You deserve the love you give to everyone else.
1. Believe you are worthy of love. We all are. If you are breathing you are worthy of love.
2. Tell yourself you are worthy of love. Tell yourself you DESERVE love.
3. If you are in control of this, do not stay in spaces where you are not loved or appreciated.
4. If you are not currently in control of this, promise yourself you will put yourself in a position where you will be in control of who has access to you.
5. Every day tell yourself that you are the creator of your destiny. You are in control of your life.
6. Go to therapy whether you think you need it or not. If you don’t think you need it, tell the therapist that you want to review some of your thoughts and patterns to make sure they are healthy.
7. Commit to putting in the work to be the healthiest version of yourself, mentally and physically.
8. Practice patience with yourself. You will make mistakes. You will not want to work on you every day. Even a day off from everything is for your greater good.
9. Allow yourself time to rest. Sometimes that rest may last 15 minutes. Sometimes it’s an hour. Sometimes it’s an evening or a day or even a week. If you are called to rest, allow yourself the time you need without beating yourself up. You will be better when you start again fresh.
10. Practice quiet time. No social media. No videos. No music. No TV. No one else either. Just quiet time. The best quiet time is in nature. Reflect on your purpose and your passion. Don’t solve problems. Don’t waste time worrying. Just breathe and allow thoughts to float to the top of your mind.
11. Keep a journal. Get thoughts out of your head and onto paper which will address overthinking and worrying. You don’t have to hold on to the problem in your head. Put it on paper and get it out of your mind. Place your worries and your problems there, then let them go. Worries and problems should not swirl in your mind 24/7. Dedicate specific and limited time to deal with these problems. Then get back to life.
12. Drink water. Regularly. Every day.
13. Eat regularly. Do not skip meals. Even if you only eat a handful of almonds and an apple. Eat regularly.
14. Try to avoid sugar. It’s a drug. It can make you angry. It can cause rapid mood swings. Even thrown a tantrum and didn’t know why? Sugar may have been the culprit.
15. Eat things that come from the Earth and thank the Earth for them. Things like tomatoes, apples, beans, and grains. Show gratitude that everything we need comes from the Earth.
16. Go to the bathroom as soon as you feel you have to use the bathroom. Holding your pee is not kind to you.
17. Get up and shower. Even when you don’t feel like it. It feels good to be clean.
18. Moisturize your body- especially right after you shower. Hit those ankles too.
19. Brush your teeth and floss every day. God gave us one set of adult teeth. That’s all we get. When they are gone that’s it. No new teeth will grow. Take care of them. Your future self will thank you for it.
20. Speaking if which… schedule to see the dentist every year. If you have a cavity, get it filled. There is nothing to fear. Not doing this is worse.
21. While we’re on it… see a primary care physician at least once a year too. Get whatever annual tests and exams they recommend.
22. Take one multivitamin a day.
23. Get a good night’s sleep. Every night. Put your phone on do not disturb if you can. Make it clear to your circle that you are not available between the hours you set so you can properly rest your mind.
24. Move your body. Try to walk even if only for 15 minutes every day.
25. Dance like no one’s watching often. Seriously. Lock the door, pump up the jams, and let it all go.
26. Stretch whenever you can. While waiting on the coffee. While talking on the phone. Strrrrrrrrrrrrrrretch.
27. Believe them when they say move it or lose it. Don’t go out like that. Move whenever you can because it’s a blessing and a privilege. Hold on to that and make moving fun. Go bowling or skating or sightseeing in your home city. But get moving.
28. Limit how much TV you absorb.
29. Read a book a month. Carry it with you everywhere. Get in a couple pages here. A couple pages there. But read. Frequently. It will expand your mind and open you up to possibilities you can’t even dream of. Never stop learning.
30. If you find yourself talking about people, don’t. Talk about ideas. Not people. Being preoccupied with the lives of others is a mind trap. No good will come from it.
31. Unless it is a principle you feel very strongly about (and this should be rare) get comfortable with people being wrong. Specifically, get comfortable with people being wrong about you. Truth speaks louder than you do. Save your precious precious time and energy. Let people be wrong.
32. Avoid circles if negativity. You don’t have to join. Negativity is a cancer. Don’t sign up for this.
33. Put your face in the sunshine. First thing in the morning. Leaving an appointment. On your lunch break. Just stop, point your face to the sun, and breathe in sunshine. Thanks the sun for warmth, and light, and for vitamin D.
34. Make a list of coping skills. Keep track of what brings you light and joy— things like putting your face in the sun, a brisk walk, a warm bath, a call to a positive friend. Keep the list growing and keep it handy. On days when you don’t feel quite right, look here for something easy to do to lift you back up and remind yourself of what’s important.
35. Decide who gets access to you and your time. It’s precious and everyone does not deserve it. You only get so much. Do you really want to say yes to something that’s a waste of time or leaves you feeling like crap? Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me. Me and my time are valuable. Everybody can’t afford it. Believe that.
36. Is there something you want to do? Write a book? Rock climb? See the ocean? Get your college degree? What are you waiting on. God ain’t making no more yesterdays. All you got is right now. Another reason you can’t afford to let knuckleheads waste your time. You have a goal you want your achieve and you’ll need all your energy for that. Get started. Now.
37. Stop apologizing for doing something for you. It’s YOUR life. You’re SUPPOSED to do stuff for you. Pour into you and do not apologize for it.
38. Make sure that one of the things you do is pursue your dreams. (See also #36 and #37.) we have been lied to about dreams. We have been told they are silly and a waste of time. That’s because Taco Hut does not want you to dream because Taco Hut needs employees. Your life belongs to you, not Taco Hut. Go for your dreams and don’t apologize for following your heart. If the dream is on your heart, it is there for a reason. Hold on to that.
39. Have a plan. Know where you are going. Even if you don’t have all the steps in between figured out. Know with every fiber of your being that life has more in store for you. There is more than this. And it’s waiting on you. All you have to do is go get it.
40. Connect to something bigger than you. When you seek a dream you do it not just for you, but for the people who came before you who blazed a path. And for the people who will come after you. You also are a trail blazer and your story will stand as testimony for people who need your story. Your story is important.
41. Work hard on getting control of your emotions. Most of what people say and do has nothing to do with us. Believe that. When they tell you you can’t do something it’s because they couldn’t do it. Let the emotion pass. Do not waste your breath. Do not let anyone move you off your square.
42. Learn to say thank you and nothing else. Be comfortable with that. Be comfortable with moving on.
43. Document your journey. It will help you remember not to double back on certain people, places and things.
44. Stay away from the trap of small indulgences. Save for things that really matter. Like a home, a trip or retirement.
45. Pay yourself first. I don’t care if all you can put in to your retirement is $25 a week. Do it. Cut out something else. Cigarettes, to go coffee, gas spent picking someone up. Put a minimum of $25 a week in retirement and never think of it again. It is not available to you. Your future self will thank you for this.
46. Get clear on what it is you want. If there is anything in life that does not serve that end part with it. Write down what you want (a house, a new job, peace in your own space) and move that way with daily intention.
47. Practice hope, positivity, empathy, and gratitude. These are skills. The better you get at reframing like from these perspectives the faster you will move towards your goals and the life you want. The universe will reward you for shifting your perspective from apathy or bitterness to one of gratefulness for whatever comes your way.
48. Forgive yourself— for everything. For every single thing that happened to you that was beyond your control. And for everything you didn’t know before today. Life is hard. We all have a past. You are forgiven. Start over every day knowing that your past was necessary to get you where you are today.
49. Catch any negative self talk you do. Replace things like, “I am so stupid” with “I am not stupid. I am smart and strong and I forgive myself for what I did not know.”
50. Reward yourself with a positive circle. People who make you laugh and believe in you. Put yourself out there. Join a club. Make a new friend. Participate in a group. It’s never too late to crate the life you truly deserve. It’s out there waiting on you!